RICH MAFFEO
Paid in full

Six thousand dollars. That’s how much we owed after the medical bills came in. It might as well have been six million, for all our ability to repay the debt.

To make things worse, my wife Nancy received word that her godmother was seriously ill. For 30 years, Hazel had been a confidant, friend and second mother to Nancy. When she hung up the phone and told me the news, I shrugged my shoulders. We didn’t have much choice. A few days later, I withdrew the remaining few dollars from our savings account, and we drove to Kansas City. Hazel died the next day.

After the funeral, we returned home and settled back into our routine. I spent much of my time looking for work, and Nancy tended to the needs of our two young children. Odd jobs kept food on the table, and, with the help of family, we trudged forward.

Then we received a surprise phone call from an attorney, advising us that Hazel had bequeathed us a portion of her estate. Would we like an advance on the money she left us? Within a week, all our debts were paid.

From time to time, when I think of how Hazel’s bequest freed us from our suffocating financial burden, my mind drifts to another who, by His death, set me free from the stranglehold of a different kind of debt. For decades, I struggled under a burden far greater than six thousand dollars, or even six million. It was one I could never repay in ten thousand lifetimes.

During those years, in my rare reflective moments, I knew something was wrong with my life. Following every new wave of passion, I drifted from one rebellion to another until my arrogance and temper, my lies, sexual flings and drunkenness bound me tighter than any iron chain. Not only did I know something was wrong. I knew what was wrong. In the deepest crevices of my heart, I sensed that the things I had done wrong (and was still doing wrong) had separated me from God, and that my lifestyle deserved His judgement. I needed to fix my life, but could hardly go a day without succumbing to some temptation or other. My debt compounded by the hour.

Then someone told me about the will. “Your sins are scarlet red,” one clause read, “but they will be whiter than snow or wool.” Another clause read, “If we confess our sins to God, He can always be trusted to forgive us and take our sins away”.

The will – better known as the Bible – continued on and on, page after page, promise upon promise. I thought it must be a dream, or a joke. No one knew the depth of my sins as well as I. Would God really wash away my filthy past? Would He really forgive me?

Desperation and hope hovered over me. At times, I thought I couldn’t breathe. And then a thought came. Would God lie? Would He promise something and not fulfill it? It was time to trust God, that the promises in the Bible were not just for people in general but for me. I went to my knees and apologized for each sin I could remember I’d ever committed. I asked God to lay my debt on Jesus Christ and forgive me. In that moment, God gave me a new life. My debt had been paid in full.

Rich Maffeo is a writer from San Diego, Calif.